“Let these vows, spoken in the presence of the Earth and all who love you, be held in the highest regard. May they bring you comfort and certainty when life is uncertain, hope and happiness in all the days to come.”

~

Emma and Robert had two wishes for their wedding day:

1. that it be an incredible party for all their family and friends
2. that it also be a serious and meaningful expression of their love, their commitment and their pagan beliefs

As a Celebrant who deeply believes in the sacred nature of these milestone moments, this was music to my ears and I could not have been happier when they chose me to create and lead their Handfasting ceremony.

The ceremony would take place (along with the tipi reception and an overnight camp for any outdoorsy guests) in a beautiful meadow in Grindleford, Sheffield. This creative couple, never ones to be put off by hard work or getting hands on, had rented a couple of fields and were creating their dream wedding day from scratch.

 

They hired a beautiful tipi, which they expertly dressed in a rustic/nature theme with wildflowers, silver birch logs and wooden plates and cutlery. Being strongly eco-conscious they were determined that their day would be as gentle and sustainable as possible. Subsequently, their wedding favours were a selection of vintage cups and goblets, each with its own hand carved wooden name tag, which guests were then encouraged to use for the duration of the celebration.

The drinks provided were also courtesy of the happy couple who, instead of renting a bar, chose to buy in wines and beers; as well as brewing their own mead for the occasion. Having sampled a little myself post-ceremony, I can assure you it was a real treat!

With an ice-cream cart, garden games and live music promised for the evening, there is no doubt that Emma and Robert fulfilled their first wish and gave their guests a day and night to remember!

But what of the ceremony?

 

For Emma and Robert this day was more than just a party; it was a sacred acknowledgement of their commitment to one another and to their two beautiful daughters. Weaving these four hearts together as a family was as important as honouring the loving connection between Bride and Groom, so we took great care to ensure that the whole family was involved in the planning and had the opportunity to say and do as much or as little as they wanted.

Emma and Robert were also committed to their personal beliefs and pagan spirituality being fully honoured and upheld within their wedding ceremony, whilst also wanting to ensure their guests did not feel alienated or uncomfortable in the face of something new and unexpected.

 

As a Celebrant experienced in holding space for pagan beliefs and rituals I was perfectly placed to express their ideas fully, whilst also carefully guiding the assembled guests through the elements that may have been unusual to them. Clear communication, respect and a loving connection all worked together to ensure that everyone was able to understand and support what was happening.

Creating a sacred space began by gathering everyone in a circle, which we cleansed and blessed, before calling in the Four Elements and setting the intention for the ritual of marriage. It is always a joy to create these sacred spaces in the wild outdoors, and I have a particularly fond memory of the wind rushing in to greet us as the Air element was welcomed.

 

 

The Handfasting was a joyful collaboration between myself, the couple and their closest family and friends. Their joined hands were bound with not one, but seven cords all together, each handmade and tied in place by the person or persons that offered it. It was such a joy to watch Emma and Robert make their vows to one another, surrounded and upheld by the love and creativity of their nearest and dearest.

 

 

Borrowing from the Wiccan tradition, we finished the ceremony with the sharing of cake and mead amongst the assembled guests. The cake was, again, made by the couple themselves, and offered around the circle by their bridesmaids.

Once everyone was nourished and grounded, we gave thanks to the spirits of place and all who had assembled before closing the circle and the ceremony in a joyful flurry of rose petal confetti!

 

This wedding and handfasting truly reflects what can be done when you free yourself from expectation and allow yourself to dream your ideal wedding day into being.

Your ceremony can – and should – reflect who you are and what matters to you most. The ideals, the emotions and the beliefs that light up your life will make the experience so much richer and more meaningful to you and those you invite to take part and bear witness.

 

Every action and word in this ceremony, and indeed the whole day, was suffused with the loving care and energy of both Emma and Robert. That love created a joyful, relaxed and accepting atmosphere that allowed them to be utterly themselves in a moment where nothing less would do.

 

 

My grateful thanks go to the incredible Matt Thompson for providing such wonderful photographs to remember this special day!